i just bought stock

I have been working and living in Las Vegas since Feb 2nd. So after I did a small amount of gambling I decided to buy some stock. "fuck it" i said to myself as I cashed in a week's paycheck into Delta stock (DAL)

i kept it for a month and made double my money. I started talking stock talk to my dad and maybe I will spread the money out over a few stocks and see how I do.

ANYWAYS....
I'm looking at stocks and I think of American Apparel. They make clothes in the US, they have a weird cult following and bizarre hipster oriented ADs. SO I started reading about them. and they are in a court fight with Woody Allen! Those assholes. I thought their shirts were so comfortable, now I hope they have to pay Woody $10 for putting up this ad without his permission.



that's a pretty funny ad. Here's the skinny on the court case from the wall street journal

as far as their stock goes (APP) i'll wait to see if they shell out $10 mil to Woody Allen and it drives it down to $2 a share. As far as buying any more American Apparel. Never ever again, guys. Why would you fuck around with Woody Allen? jackasses.


I will also tell me friends that you are Woody Allen haters. Shit heads.

Eastbound and Down...i Love you

It's close to 2 AM and I'm a little stoned on cough medicine but I wanted to write about what I just saw with the season finale of Eastbound and Down.

I know the show is not perfect, I'm sure it has it's critics. But there is so much about it that is so inspiring to me to watch.

I love that it is mean, Southern, unapologetic, filled with drugs and self destruction and ultimately with zero redemption for its main character. And that is why i Love it so much. The show is made for an audience of 8 guys, they made what they thought was good- not what they thought people wanted. I don't know if they accomplished what they set out to do, because I have no idea what that could be. But what they did do was make a comedy that doesn't pander to what people may be able to handle or not- or create a series arc that leaves you feeling like you just had a good time or grew in some way. Or ended on some half-assed cliffhanger you can't wait to see wrap up. They has the nerve to wrap things up, which should be a standard- but somehow isn't.

TV is really a whorehouse. Most everything on it is a stinking sack of shit without any soul or integrity, made by people that should not be allowed to leave the house- much less reach a mass audience. Full of second guessing and doubt and bad ideas that are just rehashes or worse ideas. But this series was really a fuck you to TV's shittiness and no balls attitude to generating more horseshit. What the show really does, what really gets my blood pumping-is that it inspires me to keep trudging through the festering pool that is the entertainment business to get a chance to be part of something that sticks it to an audience like these guys just stuck it to me.

Seeing shows like The Wire, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia. Mad Men and now Eastbound And Down make me think that there really is a place in TV to do something that couldn't be done just a few years ago- unless you made something animated that only cost $2. TV finally has avenues, like feature films and short films do- to make something that doesn't have the goal of reaching everyone out there that turns on the tube. The goal is to reach a specific audience, and that's fucking awesome.
So even if you don't dig this show the way I do, you should at least understand what I'm saying here, man. Do what you think is good and keep doing it. Even if the audience is just you.

Viva North Vegas

Hello Blog readers,

I am in Las Vegas till sometime in April and I have decided to take YOU loyal blog reader on a very special tour of Las Vegas. I could tell you about all the pretty people, doing pretty things in the coolest spots. All the lights and blah blah blah. To hell with that...

The things that really excites me about Vegas is not the shows or the gambling or the Sodom and Gomorra quality to the whole town, but it's the cheap cheap food. I drive by ads and billboards for food so cheap, it can't be true. So I decided to give myself a nonsensical challenge for this work trip in Vegas. I am going to eat the cheapest, worst food I can (every night starting last night) and tell you all about it. I thought about taking a picture of the food I eat, and following it up with a picture of what comes out of my ass the following morning. I couldn't think of a more horrible tour of Las Vegas. But I'm not sure how many people even read this goddam blog- so if you don't wanna see any poop-please say something. otherwise.....it's time for the....


I'll have to start taking pictures of the poop tonight/tomorrow. I missed the pic this morning. The idea occurred after I flushed the gorgeous turd away.

Last night I went to the Hard Rock Casino, right across the street from my TV-less place of dwelling and had a steak, 3 Shrimp, mashed potatoes and a salad for the price of $7.77
I should probably not take pictures of these meals with my phone. I need a camera for this gig.

It wasn't too bad, and I only had to walk to it. The Hard Rock is really not my kind of place.

But tonight I went to the part of town I know I should always hang out in: NORTH VEGAS
what....a....dump. I love it.

The first time I was driving through north Vegas I turned down a short street full of homeless and tents. It was like The Grapes of Wrath. And what looked to be 150 people were gathered around....something. It was like they were zombies and had caught a human and gathered all around to rip him to shreds and eat his entrails.

North Vegas is a special place. The signage just kept getting better. $1 draft beer. $7 Steak and Shrimp and then I found THE SILVER NUGGET.

During the day I can bowl (yes bowling in the casino, that kind of classy) for $1 a game. $2.75 per game at night. $1 Breakfast, $2 lunch and $3 Dinner. $2 well drinks. what a place....huh?

When I sat down in the booth, a family of mutants was sucking down desert. But I could barely hear their monster-like slurps due to the 4 young ladies screaming into a blackberry just beyond them to the East. I ordered a bowl of beef vegetable soup $1 (no picture) and the SUPER SHRIMP PLATE for $4

I couldn't even eat all this food.



It wasn't really that bad, although the roll was actually a hamburger bun for a slider. so probably no poop pics for this one

I am insured

I am no longer one of the ga-jillion americans without insurance. Because I was forced to get insurance, I caved in and got it. so hopefully someone will break my nose and i'll have a good story to tell and it will only cost me $50.

My insurance is too expensive, but after this year's taxes I will no doubt look like the working poor and will get a nice discount. I think when I am unconsious in a horrible car accident I will need to present this card for treatment.

more video? what a jackass...right?

INSPIRATIONAL VIDEO

Finishing up the Sundance Bloggin'

Right now I am about 250 miles from Vegas driving back from Park City. I drove us through a shit-ton of snow coming down the mountain and now Katie has taken over the driving for a minute. This'll be a long blog, because I'm going to finish telling you my thoughts on the movies I haven't yet mentioned that I saw.

here's a video that doesn't do all the snow coming down justice:



Prom Night in Mississippi

I realize I never said anything about this movie because I saw it before it premiered...so let me say it now. This movie fucking sucks. Worst thing I saw at the festival. This MIGHT have made a decent 10 minute short....maybe. The Filmmaking is just flat out bad. They provide no insight into their subject, it is really just a prom video with a bunch of high school kids pontificating on race. At the Q&A the filmmakers couldn't really answer a single question about their subjects..at all. It was lame.

Crude

Fell asleep during this snooze-fest so I walked out. Pretty boring, maybe I'll give it another chance. heard a funny story about the director being an ass-hat at a few festival venues. It really is just another Eco-doc....someone is killing the Earth, a Corporate giant is Evil......this won't play anywhere but on PBS and film fests.

No Impact Man

This is an Eco doc that works. I guy decides for him, his wife and child to have no impact on the environment for one year. No trash, no transportation that is not powered by a human. No electricity, toilet paper....they go all out. The reason this doc works is because it is about this couple, who are also doing the eco thing. it is funny and entertaining and you learn shit about all that green living stuff. I enjoyed it and I'm sure it will influence my food habits for a couple of weeks.

World's Greatest Dad

This is Bobcat Goldthwait's film starring Robin Williams as a dad whose son dies in a freak masturbation accident. I heard people say this was a touching film- i don;t agree, but it was entertaining and had funny moments. it is a movie that lives in a weird place, it stars Robin Williams- but anyone who liked his last several movies will abhor this. And the film doesn't really push any boundries or ideas far enough to really appeal to hardcore cinefiles. it is kind of tame, even though it sounds like a black comedy winner. But there are great moments and it is full of sexual perversion.

Brief Interviews with Hideous Men

I really enjoyed this film even though I really didn't care for about half of it. The film is full of vinettes and monologues by some really talented actors. So when a section would begin that I wasn't into, I would wait it out and usually would like the next. Guys talking about sex, being jerkfaces and all that is always entertaining. The film is directed by Joe Krasinski from The (american) Office and my only criticism was for him to stay the hell out of his movie and never-ever say the line "I stand before you naked." Other than that, he handled everything wonderfully. and it is really well shot and the way several of the scenes plays out is really innovative.

Bronson

This film was right on time. Plotless violence and a great psycho performance from Tom Hardy as Britain's most famous prisoner. The film feels like Chopper at points. I really enjoyed it, especially about 25 movies into the festival. The lead character just likes to fight and stomp people. Never has an actor punched so many people in the face in one film. and he fights pitbulls with his bare hands.

Toe to Toe

i though this was a little too long at 110 minutes. It could have been 85 and really been a contender for some awards. It is about a rich white girl in high school that has more problems than her new friend, the black girl from across the tracks that is gonna study and make something of herself. Good looking cinematography, great acting and "I feel gross" sexual encounters made this an entertaining film even if it was quite bloated. I look forward to another film from this director.

An Education

This movie really ruins itself in the last 15 minutes. It was enjoyable enough for most of the film, then it goes to hell. I won't write more about it because I'm still pissed at the tacked-on, assenbly line ending to this film. Booooooo, BBC Films.

In the Loop

Hilarious political farce. great work all around. One of the few films that didn't insult my intelligence. It also co-stars Ann Chlumsky from BLOOD CAR. This movie should be at a theatre near you. The dialogue in this film is BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM....super fast and sharp. The insults in this film are so great that the same jackasses that do random scenes from Glengarry Glenross will pick up a few of these.

Big Fan

Written and directed by The Wrestler scribe Robert D. Siegel. This is an odd, dark film. I like it....some people might call it a little thin, and maybe it is- but I still like the film. Patton Oswalt is an obsessive Jets fan that lives with his Mom and works in a parking lot. Even if you've never been football crazy- you've been crazy about something else and can relate to this guy. I don;t want to give any more synopsis and ruin the great early turn this film takes- it caught me off guard and really pulled me in-I thought I was going to watch the kind of movie that shows you a pathetic character and you look down on him- but this movie is not that. Oh yeah, and Kevin Corrigan is in it- who doesn't love that guy? WHO? Show them to me!

It Might Get Loud

Rockers Jimmy Page, Jack White and The Edge (what kind of goddam name is that?) rock out. Jack White is actually pretty interesting but this shit gets pretty old after a while. They should cut this down and sell it to TV.

Stingray Sam

new shit from Cory McAbee....HELL YEAH. I LOVE LOVE LOVE The American Astronaut so I enjoyed this 6 episode series of space cowboy musical awesomeness. I'm so happy that he keeps doing his thing because no one else can do that thing this man does. You'll get to see these on some kind of screen, sometime soon. Till then GO TO THE WEBSITE and watch the trailer and get excited. you fucking should be!

The Big Winner

Tonight I am officially done with this Park City business. Last night, Blake Myers invited katie and I to the Slamdance Party. here's a pic of Blake and Myself:

We hung out with all the good peoples there like Ashley and David, who were jurors for the Docs at Slamdance.Actually, I'm not sure when exactly it was that I was done with the Sundance festival, but I am. When I went up the hill to Slamdance, with their Rock n Roll attitude, drunk yelling awards ceremony and a party full of people I actually knew- I realized I really liked it there (there was also an open bar)



the next day I was hurting a little on my final volunteer shift. Then I saw the ANIMATION SPOTLIGHT at the Eccles theatre. There were 3 really great shorts in this program.

Dear Beautiful
This short has more going on than most features I saw. And it is the first animated short that has actually scared me. It is half married couple drama, half zombie apocalypse. Pretty fucking amazing.

Western Spaghetti
hey festival programmers, do yourself a favor and start a shorts program with this one. You can;t help but be in a good mood after watching it. It is simply cooking with stop motion. Good times.

And the Alex Orr Award for best thing I saw at this mutha goes to:

I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
If you don;t know who Don Hertzfeld is, get with it. His animated shorts are epics with stick figures. There's nothing better. And I can safely say that this film that runs 22min- is the best thing I saw out of 33 programs- short, feature, whatever- this is The Big Winner. It is about Life and Death, family, love and it is hilarious. There's no reason for me to tell you a thing about any of his films. Just whatever it is you have to do to watch them. That's that, mattress man.

I saw a program and a half of live action shorts and I'll highlight my favorites and just forget about the films that made me doubt that all 5600 submissions could have been viewed if this was what they had to show me.

Abbie Cancelled

Abbie cancels on the dinner party. Funny ensues. let me just say that anytime unexpected gas huffing happens in a short film- I'm usually pleased.

Copper on the Chopping Block

There are moments of this film- where a crazy man is alone with tire swings, gas masks and unwanted kitty that is really goddam great. A nice long lock down of him throwing snowballs against a basketball goal is the best. I just loved the simple things this short did- there are also some big things- but somehow the less was more.

Captain Coulier (space explorer)
Let's say you look at me and say "I wanna make a short that kinda makes fun of star trek."
I would reply. "Good luck with that." and then I'd mumble "Asshole." because that shit is played out. Which is why this short is fucking great, because it doesn't do some simple stupid sci-fi parody. The lead in this short is just funny. So his kicking around and not wanting to do the "space captain" thing is great. and the low-fi saucer on a string shots are great. This short should be a TV series, in my opinion. It's like sci-fi hipster pettiness and bitching. funny shit.

This was about all I saw of shorts program 5 ( I saw all of 1) because I left to see what everyone has been calling The Big Winner. It won Audience award for Dramatic Feature, Grand Jury prize and.....something else.

PUSH: based on the novel by Sapphire

Mo'Nique delivers the goods in this heavy handed drama set in 1987 Harlem. people say this movie is uplifting while dealing with incest and horrible abuse- that's not true - it really isn't uplifting, but it does give white people a chance to feel like they understand the plight of the African American. I just can;t give crying middle aged woman a break when they attend a film like this. I'll admit, the movie is really good. There are parts that give me a chance to daydream about this or that, and the film really took about an hour to really grab me. The thing that hurt this film the most to me was the director talking about it. I don't really like someone telling me how much something will affect me before i see it. But there are some solid performances in this film and they really commit to the "break a puppy's neck" school of filmmaking- that doesn't bother me in this film, liek ti does in others.

ok, I'm bouncing in the morning. I could watch a few more movies tomorrow, but its time to go home. I'll write about the other films I've skipped in the car and post them for all 3 of you guys reading this.